So, I just got home from girls night out. I love hanging out with my friends. These girls are the best. They love to do more than my boring supposed bffs. These girls are fun, and they want to do stuff. They like to have a good time, and it's not like pulling teeth. I miss these girls when we don't hang out for awhile. I really do.
So, we went to dinner at Kitty Hownes and then we went to the comedy club. Each of us has a designated month and we have to plan the event for that month. This not only forces us to get together monthly, but we get the opportunity to do different things. It was Meghan's month and it was so much fun! I forgot how much fun comedy clubs are, seeing as I haven't been in well over 5 years.
What I love about my friends is that yes, we all wanted to hang out, but it was 10pm and we were ready to go home and get in comfy clothes. I love that that we can be ourselves, and no on feels like we need to stay out till 2am, just because. I love that our next month get-together is a sleepover. An almost 30 year old sleepover (for most of us at least). We'll pretend we don't have kids (some of us) or husbands (most of us) for just one night, and we'll get in our sweats, and make dinner and snack and talk, and tickle each others arms (!), just like we did 11 or 12 years ago when we didn't have a care in the world. And, it will be amazing. I will miss my kids, but it will be okay. Their daddy will spend quality time with them!
Speaking of which, I came home tonight and was feeling a little sentimental. I had a.lot of fun, but I also missed my babies. They were well taken care of by their amazing daddy, whom I happen to be in love with, but I missed giving them goodnight kisses, and reading books, and I even missed brushing teeth, just a tiny little bit. I went in each of their rooms and saw their sleeping bodies, and I cried. I cried because I don't always stop to remember how very blessed I am. I bitch a lot about working, and wanting a bigger house, and even how much crap I do all day long, but what I saw when I walked in and saw them sleeping peacefully was graditude, and love, and this amazing feeling of happiness. I felt like nothing else mattered, because I was the luckiest person in the world. I have these 2 amazing beings, who make my life complete, who make me the happiest person in the world, despite all the crap I hate. I have two babies, who really, truthfully, aren't babies anymore, that need me. I play this important role as a mommy and unlike my day job, I never ever, in a million years want to disappoint them or let them down. I want to be a good example for them and show them how to love and act. I want them to be as proud of me as I am of them.
Tomorrow we have a long to do list, with lots of fun. We will do some celebrating, because we love to, and we'll have lots of fun. We'll stay in our jammies for as long as we can, and we'll cuddle and play, and make breakfast. We'll treat tomorrow as if it was our last, because we will not take life for granted.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Saturday, September 11, 2010
today...
7:30am Nicolette woke us up when she came into our room
7:35am Nicolette asked to watch Rocket (aka Little Einsteins). We said no.
7:40am Nicolette asked to watch Rocket, again- the monster one. We gave in and decided we were up for the day.
8:50am m Go get Cole so he can join in on the family fun.
8:55am Nicolette and Cole were holding hands. It lasted long enough for a picture. Then Nicolette was too cool for that. Cole got upset and kept saying, "hand, hand". We need a king sized bed. Soon. We already have the frame.
8:15am Go downstairs for breakfast. Give Cole a banana and then yogurt. Nicolette throws a huge fit because she wants a fork- to eat her yogurt and does not ask nicely. Jon and I eat apple pie. Not too healthy, but so fall-ish and so good. We both make coffee, but I only drink 2 sips because the milk is bad.
8:30am Fit is over. Nicolette eats the eggs Jon made her. She wanted them on toast with butter, and at it all.
8:45am The kids actually play nicely. Nicolette helps me pick out Scholatic books that she wants. Jon falls asleep- as always.
9:25am Decide it's time to get ready so we can go to Old Navy for $4 leggings.
10:40am Finally leave for the mall. Jon leavess for golf. All day and night golf. ON has like 5 pairs of leggings for toddlers. We buy puffy vests instead.
11:20am Got to Wegmans. I forgot to put makup on so I decide to walk around with my sunglasses on. I hate when people do that. I'm such a hypocrite. Nicolette throws fit #2 at Wegmans. This is becoming a recurrent event. I get pizza logs. I know they aren't good for you, but they are SO good.
12:05pm Lunch at home. Macaroni and cheese with organic pasta. It looks gross.
1:00pm Naptime for Cole. Nicolette watched Harry and the Hendersons. My mom bought it for her. I have no idea why she likes it. I play on the computer, do laundry, clean up, cuddle with my baby girl, check FB, return emails, talk to my mom.
3:35pm We get Cole up, have some chocolate milk and go upstairs to organize. I am in an organizing mood. I love these moods because I can be a packrat sometimes, Find lots of clothes that no longer fit. My kids are finally growing. And, I love shopping. A LOT. We got so much done.
5:30pm Decide what to do for dinner. Nicolette wants pb and j, but not j. She doesn't like my homemade jelly. So, I gave them pb and fluff for the first time. They inhaled it!
6:00pm We played with all the toys for a good hour, nicely together, I might add. Makes my heart happy to see that.
7:00pm We went outside and picked some veggies in the garden. We planted it late this year so we're in prime time season here. The kids watched me for awhile and then ran in the backyard. We got a ton of tomatoes, bell peppers- red and green, sweet cherry peppers, eggplant and cucumbers. Oh, and hot peppers. YUM!! I love having a garden. It's so much healthier for you, and easier and cheaper too!
7:35pm We went back inside, took baths and got ready for bed. We made the bath water turn pink today. Sometimes I wonder if I should give the kids separate baths, but it's much easier to do it together, and plus, we typically do showers.
8:05pm Jammies are on, teeth are brushed and little buggas are on their way to bed. Cole is first, and then Nicolette. We've been playing games befpre bed lately. Tonight it was Candyland. She beats me every time, and I don't even cheat. We read Toy Story and she is off to sleep.
8:45pm Jon is home from his golf tournament. We had a good day, but missed him. We eat apple pie for dinner. Well, he ate dinner at his golf thing, I guess I ate pie for dinner. I played on the computer while he watched the Michigan game, in fast mode. He went all day without knowing the score and was very happy about that! I checked the score and knew they won!
10:30pm I went up to bed. I was exhausted!
7:35am Nicolette asked to watch Rocket (aka Little Einsteins). We said no.
7:40am Nicolette asked to watch Rocket, again- the monster one. We gave in and decided we were up for the day.
8:50am m Go get Cole so he can join in on the family fun.
8:55am Nicolette and Cole were holding hands. It lasted long enough for a picture. Then Nicolette was too cool for that. Cole got upset and kept saying, "hand, hand". We need a king sized bed. Soon. We already have the frame.
8:15am Go downstairs for breakfast. Give Cole a banana and then yogurt. Nicolette throws a huge fit because she wants a fork- to eat her yogurt and does not ask nicely. Jon and I eat apple pie. Not too healthy, but so fall-ish and so good. We both make coffee, but I only drink 2 sips because the milk is bad.
8:30am Fit is over. Nicolette eats the eggs Jon made her. She wanted them on toast with butter, and at it all.
8:45am The kids actually play nicely. Nicolette helps me pick out Scholatic books that she wants. Jon falls asleep- as always.
9:25am Decide it's time to get ready so we can go to Old Navy for $4 leggings.
10:40am Finally leave for the mall. Jon leavess for golf. All day and night golf. ON has like 5 pairs of leggings for toddlers. We buy puffy vests instead.
11:20am Got to Wegmans. I forgot to put makup on so I decide to walk around with my sunglasses on. I hate when people do that. I'm such a hypocrite. Nicolette throws fit #2 at Wegmans. This is becoming a recurrent event. I get pizza logs. I know they aren't good for you, but they are SO good.
12:05pm Lunch at home. Macaroni and cheese with organic pasta. It looks gross.
1:00pm Naptime for Cole. Nicolette watched Harry and the Hendersons. My mom bought it for her. I have no idea why she likes it. I play on the computer, do laundry, clean up, cuddle with my baby girl, check FB, return emails, talk to my mom.
3:35pm We get Cole up, have some chocolate milk and go upstairs to organize. I am in an organizing mood. I love these moods because I can be a packrat sometimes, Find lots of clothes that no longer fit. My kids are finally growing. And, I love shopping. A LOT. We got so much done.
5:30pm Decide what to do for dinner. Nicolette wants pb and j, but not j. She doesn't like my homemade jelly. So, I gave them pb and fluff for the first time. They inhaled it!
6:00pm We played with all the toys for a good hour, nicely together, I might add. Makes my heart happy to see that.
7:00pm We went outside and picked some veggies in the garden. We planted it late this year so we're in prime time season here. The kids watched me for awhile and then ran in the backyard. We got a ton of tomatoes, bell peppers- red and green, sweet cherry peppers, eggplant and cucumbers. Oh, and hot peppers. YUM!! I love having a garden. It's so much healthier for you, and easier and cheaper too!
7:35pm We went back inside, took baths and got ready for bed. We made the bath water turn pink today. Sometimes I wonder if I should give the kids separate baths, but it's much easier to do it together, and plus, we typically do showers.
8:05pm Jammies are on, teeth are brushed and little buggas are on their way to bed. Cole is first, and then Nicolette. We've been playing games befpre bed lately. Tonight it was Candyland. She beats me every time, and I don't even cheat. We read Toy Story and she is off to sleep.
8:45pm Jon is home from his golf tournament. We had a good day, but missed him. We eat apple pie for dinner. Well, he ate dinner at his golf thing, I guess I ate pie for dinner. I played on the computer while he watched the Michigan game, in fast mode. He went all day without knowing the score and was very happy about that! I checked the score and knew they won!
10:30pm I went up to bed. I was exhausted!
never forget
Nice years later and I still get all choked up. It breaks my heart, for every single being that was touched by this terrible tragedy, and for our whole country. Never forget.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
why does it have to be so hard?
Today was a rough day. I haven't had one of these in awhile. And let me tell you, it's not fun. I hate it and can't wait until those days are over.
I try not to talk about it- for multiple reasons- but I had to go back to work today. It was a day I've been dreading since summer began. I pretended it wasn't coming up, that somehow if I ignored it, it wouldn't come (yeah, that didn't work). I'm completely in denial. Yeah, not sure how to get to the next step of grief. What is it anyways? Get mad? And, besides being in denial, I also am aware enough to realize how blessed I really am, which makes me feel like crap for feeling what I do.
I hate leaving my kids with someone else while I go to work and deal with someone elses kids. The logic doesn't make sense. All I want in life is to be at home with them. My time is dwindling. After this year, I have one year home with nicolette and a few more than that with cole. I would kick butt if I was at home. I just know I would.
Okay, no more details. I don't even want to think about it anymore. Coping mechanisms.
andrea
I try not to talk about it- for multiple reasons- but I had to go back to work today. It was a day I've been dreading since summer began. I pretended it wasn't coming up, that somehow if I ignored it, it wouldn't come (yeah, that didn't work). I'm completely in denial. Yeah, not sure how to get to the next step of grief. What is it anyways? Get mad? And, besides being in denial, I also am aware enough to realize how blessed I really am, which makes me feel like crap for feeling what I do.
I hate leaving my kids with someone else while I go to work and deal with someone elses kids. The logic doesn't make sense. All I want in life is to be at home with them. My time is dwindling. After this year, I have one year home with nicolette and a few more than that with cole. I would kick butt if I was at home. I just know I would.
Okay, no more details. I don't even want to think about it anymore. Coping mechanisms.
andrea
Sunday, September 5, 2010
over the RAINBOW!
Yesterday was nicolettte's third birthday party. It was a rainbow theme, with candy (by request). I was sad that so many people couldn't make it, but it is a holiday weekend. It was a small party, but still really nice. She was so excited for blowing out her candles!
I, of course, was scrambling around till well past two, when the party started. I am a bad judge of time and going to Wegmans, with a little girl who threw a huge tantrum, took a little longer than expected. We pulled it off, and I had lots of helpers!
candy buffet
Little miss three! It's so hard to get a decent picture of her lately.
Mike and Nicole
Lucy and Nicole
Alaina
rainbow cupcakes
Wiped out from a long, fun day!
I, of course, was scrambling around till well past two, when the party started. I am a bad judge of time and going to Wegmans, with a little girl who threw a huge tantrum, took a little longer than expected. We pulled it off, and I had lots of helpers!
candy buffet
Little miss three! It's so hard to get a decent picture of her lately.
Mike and Nicole
Lucy and Nicole
Alaina
rainbow cupcakes
Wiped out from a long, fun day!
Saturday, September 4, 2010
today i loved...
...seeing nicolette so excited to have her birthday party.
...the beautiful colors of the rainbow that decorated my house for nicolette's birthday party.
...the conversation I had with nicolette-
nicolette: I want to be Jessie for Halloween, Mommy.
me: Really? Do you have any money? The costume costs forty dollars.
nicolette: (real quick) I have six dollars.
me: Where did you get six dollars?
nicolette: Daddy gave it to me.
me: How come?
nicolette: He's a nice boy. (agreed)
...the sleepy face cole has when he first wakes up. He usually needs some time to lay in his crib before I get him, but it was party time so he woke up and came downstairs to a crazy houseful of people. The poor kid was so confused.
...how my brother had a headache and just went upstairs to lay down. It makes me so happy that people feel relaxed enough here to do that. Other friends felt comfortable too!
...how all our hardwork paid off the night before. I loved how Lucy stayed over through our falling rainbow cake, rainbow cupcakes at 11:30pm and meatballs at 12:30am.
...the little pigtails of our friend's daughter, Alaina. She just satrted walking and was so cute!
...getting a postcard in the mail from nicolette's preschool teachers, welcoming her! How is she going to preschool already??
...the adorable clothes that nicolette got for her birthday. I love to dress her. I wish I had more money to spend.
I can't wait till tomorrow to see what's in store.
...the beautiful colors of the rainbow that decorated my house for nicolette's birthday party.
...the conversation I had with nicolette-
nicolette: I want to be Jessie for Halloween, Mommy.
me: Really? Do you have any money? The costume costs forty dollars.
nicolette: (real quick) I have six dollars.
me: Where did you get six dollars?
nicolette: Daddy gave it to me.
me: How come?
nicolette: He's a nice boy. (agreed)
...the sleepy face cole has when he first wakes up. He usually needs some time to lay in his crib before I get him, but it was party time so he woke up and came downstairs to a crazy houseful of people. The poor kid was so confused.
...how my brother had a headache and just went upstairs to lay down. It makes me so happy that people feel relaxed enough here to do that. Other friends felt comfortable too!
...how all our hardwork paid off the night before. I loved how Lucy stayed over through our falling rainbow cake, rainbow cupcakes at 11:30pm and meatballs at 12:30am.
...the little pigtails of our friend's daughter, Alaina. She just satrted walking and was so cute!
...getting a postcard in the mail from nicolette's preschool teachers, welcoming her! How is she going to preschool already??
...the adorable clothes that nicolette got for her birthday. I love to dress her. I wish I had more money to spend.
I can't wait till tomorrow to see what's in store.
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